Minette Marrin, writing in the [UK] Sunday Times, reacts to a BBC2 documentary about a couple with Down syndrome who are deciding whether to marry. Marrin’s sister has an intellectual disability. An excerpt:

It is hard enough to be an adequate parent with supposedly normal intelligence. For someone of very low intelligence it is even harder. That is presumably why so many — 50%-60% — of babies born to parents with learning disabilities are taken away by social workers, a horrifying thing but arguably, in many cases, the least worst thing to do.

… I hate to be someone who thinks social workers may be right, sometimes, in removing a child from parents with learning disabilities. I hate to be someone who thinks it is unwise and unfair to encourage people with LDs to have babies and I certainly wouldn’t attempt to stop anyone. But wishful thinking is sometimes at odds with a sense of responsibility, as I think Emma and Ben came to feel. There are some things in life that all the love you have cannot change and cannot make better.

Related post: Pregnant woman with learning disabilities flees to keep baby

A documentary on BBC2’s “Wonderland” series, follows Emma Bishop and Ben Marshall, two young adults in England who have been together for six years and are very much in love. Both have Down syndrome.

They want to wed, but face complications from their parents and from the benefits system. “The thing with having Down syndrome is that sometimes you’re not treated like an adult,” explained Emma. “And people don’t listen to what you say.”

In the [UK] Independent, reviewer Alice-Azania Jarvis says the work is “a moving, striking and insightful film…, not to mention one, which, hopefully will work towards changing the attitudes Emma mentioned.”

Lucy Mangan, writing in the [UK] Guardian, called the documentary a “slight film” that fails to consider the broader context of “the difficulties of reconciling adult human rights with childlike vulnerabilities.” Still, she says, the film was valuable for providing “a nuanced portrait of two people leading the kind of lives rarely seen at length on the screen.”

From the  [UK] Daily Mail, [UK] Times:

A pregnant woman with learning disabilities and her fiance have reportedly fled Scotland after social workers threatened to take away their baby at birth, saying the woman was not capable of raising the child.

Two months ago, the couple’s wedding was halted 48 hours before the ceremony in a dispute over whether Kerry Robertson, 17, was capable of consenting to marry Mark McDougall, 25.

The high-profile case highlights the dilemma facing social workers who must both protect the welfare of babies and vulnerable adults with disability, but at the same time protect the rights of those adults to lead fulfilled lives.

Mr. McDougall told a newspaper that he and his fiancée decided to leave Scotland after they saw the minutes of a meeting in which social workers claimed their child could suffer emotional harm if left with Miss Robertson.

From CNN, National Public Radio, CBS News, and USA Today:

The Government Accountability Office, the investigative arm of Congress, is releasing a report today which documents the widespread abuse of techniques used to restrain or discipline students with disabilities in both public and private schools across the country.

The GAO report will be considered by the House Education and Labor Committee, which today is holding hearings about restraints and seclusion techniques. The committee is considering new laws to govern what actions teachers can take to discipline students with disabilities. (A live webcast of the hearings can be seen here. Written testimony is being posted on the committee’s webpage here as it is given.)

“I think what we’re going to hear from the GAO is that very often, special-need children are subjected to the policies of seclusion and policies of restraint that have turned out to be lethal in a number of circumstances,” said Rep. George Miller, D-California, the committee’s chairman.

Some cases include the use of face-down restraints; the use of seclusion rooms for hours to discipline children as young as 6 years old; and death or injuries that have occurred after children have been tied, taped, handcuffed or pinned down by adults.

Earlier posts here.

From the Boston Globe:

Three sisters with a rare degenerative brain disease are among 21,000 people who will lose crucial services if the Massachusetts legislature approves a proposal to cut $100 million in budget cuts. The Arc of Massachusetts has planned a protest rally at the State House this morning.

Jillian, Lindsey and Kelsey Burke would lose the recreational, respite and family support services that have kept the Burke family afloat.

A spokeswoman for the state Department of Developmental Services said shrinking revenues forced the department to take the “difficult step” of eliminating funding for family support services.  “Of course no agency wants to be in a position to need to make these types of cuts, but fiscal realities required that we make some very difficult decisions,” she said.

Writing the New York Times’ Modern Love column, David Finch says his “facade of semi-normalcy” fell away in the third year of marriage, revealing someone “cynical and withdrawn, obsessive and preoccupied, dismissive and unhelpful.” His wife, a speech pathologist who works with autistic children, had her suspicions, but it took two more years before she was able to tell him he had Asperger’s syndrome.

Finch credits his wife with helping him develop empathy and other adaptive behaviors.

From the Washington Post:

Couples who have a child with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder are nearly twice as likely to divorce or separate as couples who do not have children with the disorder, according to a definitive new study.

The reason, apparently, is that children who are inattentive or hyperactive can exacerbate conflicts, tensions and arguments between parents.

Researchers said the evidence suggests that parents are psychologically worn thin by difficult exchanges with their children, and thus have less ability to respond to other challenges calmly. Several researchers said parents need to develop techniques to improve coping skills, and to take good care of themselves.

… “Many parents do not take care of themselves. We encourage them to do that even though they may feel they have no time because of all their commitments to their families,” said Andrea Chronis-Tuscano, a psychologist who directs the University of Maryland’s ADHD Program. “One of our mantras is, ‘If you don’t take care of yourself, you can’t do your best as a parent.’ “