Thoughts on cosmetic surgery and Down syndrome

Responding to an earlier article about a couple pondering plastic surgery for their daughter with Down syndrome, Gail Williamson offers another viewpoint. She writes:

About 10 years ago I appeared on a U.S. talk show “Leeza” with host Leeza Gibbons. The topic was plastic surgery to make children with Down syndrome appear more typical. Appearing with me were a surgeon and a family with a young daughter who had undergone the surgery. They were all pleased and amazed at how beautiful the child was, and they were sure she would go through life facing fewer prejudices.

I saw a young girl who still had some of the physical characteristics that can be found in people with Down syndrome – a flat-footed walk and low muscle tone – and a face that was something between Down syndrome and typical.

At the time my son with Down syndrome was 18 and physically attractive for a young man with an extra 21st chromosome, and was also an actor. I was asked to comment on the surgery and how I would feel about it for my son.

My response was that I enjoyed the fact that my son’s face showed that he had Down syndrome. I felt that it caused the general public to cut him some slack, and that then he was able to show people how charming and personable he really was. Without the message his facial features gave the public, they might not have understood why he might have appeared different. They might have thought he was on drugs, drunk, or making fun of them. Having the facial features of Down syndrome was to his advantage in my mind.

Years later my son was cast in the controversial Warner Bros. drama “Nip/Tuck.” The character “Tommy Bolton” goes to the doctors, with his parents’ support, and asks to have surgery to look like his family. He tells the doctors that he has Down syndrome and it isn’t his fault. He tells them everyone else gets to look like the people that they love. Why shouldn’t he?

The doctors tell the family that it would take many surgeries and lots of money to meet his request, but suggest that Tommy have a bump added to his nose, the same bump that his father and siblings have, the family “Bolton Bump.” Following surgery Tommy tells the doctor, “Oh my, I look like my Dad.” I felt the writers of “Nip/Tuck” addressed this controversial subject in a very responsible way. It was obvious that this was Tommy’s choice, not something his family wanted him to do.

Everyone has to make their own choices in life and live with the consequences. I am pleased our son lives well in his skin with Down syndrome. He has a happy life. He has dated the same woman with Down syndrome for four years now and loves her dearly. He is an avid photographer, and other professional photographers love sharing the passion with him.

On a hike in the Santa Monica Mountains in Los Angeles this weekend, we ran into a man taking wildlife photos for publication and spent time talking to him about his work and his camera (with lenses the size of an elephant’s leg!) Would he have spent so much of his time showing us his photos if my son hadn’t shown an interest and had his own Nikon around this neck? Would my son have then taken time to photograph the same ducks in the pond after the conversation? I don’t think so. Nothing was said about the Down syndrome, but this man shared his passion with my son, I believe, because he saw the passion of someone with challenges and the photographer wanted to enrich my son’s experience in the moment. I am thankful for my son’s face.

Does my son enjoy having Down syndrome? Not all the time. Recently, together, we presented a talk to 80 students in the 10th grade in a downtown Los Angeles high school. It was a science class and they were studying DNA, chromosomes, genes and the like.

During a question and answer session at the end of class, one young man asked my son what he liked least about having Down syndrome. My son told him that he wanted to be a regular guy like the students in the class. He wanted to go to college, drive a car, get married and raise children. He wasn’t sure he would be able to do all those things in his lifetime. He also told the student that we don’t know why he had Down syndrome and that any student in the class could have had it just as easily. You could have heard a pin drop when my son said those words.

When the class was over, student after student approached my son and told him how much they appreciated his coming to class and what he had to say. I’m hoping that each of them will “cut some slack” to the next person they meet whose face says “I have Down syndrome.” Maybe they will find out how charming they are and what passions they have; maybe they’ll even make a new friend.

Gail is the executive director of DSALA, the Down Syndrome Association of Los Angeles. See earlier post about her here. She’s also quoted in the article found here.

See followup here: Amid controversy, couple defends plastic surgery to help daughter fit in 

This entry was posted on Monday, March 3rd, 2008 at 7:51 pm and is filed under Down syndrome, NOT2BEMISSED, medicine, personal stories, public attitudes, stigma. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.  Email This Post